Socially awkward characters are not awkward; at least not in their eyes. We are. The disconnect comes from the results of what we see compared to set expectations. Situations expect one to lie but if one doesn’t makes one socially or emotionally deficient. Loud observations are not generally allowed in the current society. It thrives on trending truths.
I find it paradoxical that the very society that mocks these characters ends up depending on them for their survival. Tesla, Newton, Ada, Ayan Rand, Jesus, Albert Pike, all philosophers and the list goes on and on. These people survived by isolation and disintegrated the moment they tried to blend in. Then a while in isolation and beasts are born. Then it follows that they can safely attribute most of their success to the times they were in isolation.
In the modern world, we have had famous stories of people who tried integrating into societal standards only to suffer. The become phoenixes when they come out bigger; and operating alone. At this point they have already gone bankrupt, been kicked out their own companies, gotten stolen from, endured slander and worse not mentioned but it is the rising that amazes me.
During these moments, you are your worst self. Self defeat is at its highest during these moments. You look back. Then the self analysis begins. Every move made, coin spent, person spoken to and what you told now counts. Then all feed back is analyzed as well. Most of these moments feel like wooden steaks to the heart; you die every time it hits you. It burns. It burns being you.
Still on the moments you get to understand the worst of the moments. When you realize that you missed all the cues of the socially intelligent. That by missing them you came across as dumb as it could get. Remember every thing is your fault as everything is a decision. You feel like a failed human, a lesser specimen; something to hide and not to be associated with.
At this exact moment; what are you?
The fires have to be waited out before the ashes can bring forth a new bird. You get to understand your purest form. Jesus went to the desert, Budha found truth by sitting silent under a tree whilst Newton wasn’t as lucky because all we got was a formula and possibility of brain damage. Muhammad found truth in a cave. Steve Jobs dug into his philosophy and properly capitalized. So many more examples exist I would have to do a book on it. If you can, do.
I’ll however dwell on that moment between the fire subsiding and regrowth. Life forms from seed. So what is your seed? That thing that you can get lost doing and ultimately soothes your ego back to life? What is it? A person? A place? A mission? A skill? Here’s the thing, all the fore mentioned have a quality redeeming whatever it is they failed at.
Most inventors are socially poor. People hate their guts or whatever it is they are. Conversely, they avoid rooms with people because they know how it is like at their lowest. However; the world loves their work. Their works are worshiped but not one person would dare try friendship with such blunt characters.
I wouldn’t speculate as to why the world is as it is, just as I can’t explain whether light is a wave or a particle. What I can speculate on is the new person after all the burning. They change, people say they are heartless. Those that are nice don’t event stick around for long. None of them want the burden of being good.
All that matters is; is the mission on track? So what are you and what did you set out to do at your lowest?